September 12, 2008

I finally realize...


It was just recently that I checked my inbox and realize that most of the messages were from new friends, girlfriend, family members and yah...some of my close buddy.
I think about my "friends" and I wonder if there were at any time friend of mine or is it just a project that we were friends?
I said it before and I will say it again, yes...even if I have to say it with frustration...
"I spent my youth serving in church and my 'so-called' friends now are too busy to even give me a simple msg."
I am not just referring to people whom in a way not much related to me, but people who are from the same cell group, people who call themselves family.
I am disappointed. We are talking about making a difference...giving a little time to others. And OMG....we don't even have time for someone whom we hang out weekly in church. No wonder the song HEAL THE WORLD only talk about giving a little time and a little space because even for that we are not able to do it.
Talking about busy...I believe I am in every single way as busy as those people if not even busier.
Well, some might say that they have family and yes exactly, I have a family whom I spend time with every time I come back during the weekends.
Girlfriend...I have one whom I love and would be spending time with her almost everyday, so that she would be even more happy being with me.
Work...I am working my ASS off every week back in Ipoh and my travelling time is even more than your "ministries" or "busy activities".
Beyond that, I have my studies which I need to maintain my CGPA at 3.50 for my scholarship and that means I need to put in much effort into reading and doing exercise as well.
And not to forget about the fact that I am also attending church, every week on Sunday for at least 2 hours and I am also going to my grandma's place for at least an hour plus weekly.
If that is not busy, then what is it?
I am sick of doing the job of smsing saying..."hey how are u? take care ya bro/sis! n keep in touch!"
And I would have reply like "Yah...you too...take care ya! Keep in touch!"
Cut that word out if you are not serious. And I mean it....I am not asking for anything...I am only asking for that sincerity in becoming a friend.
Some of these people are extremely good people to me and honestly I don't mind naming some here. (That is how frustrated I have become of these people who treated me as a PROJECT)
I must say that some people are good enough to still keep in touch with me...people like Addie, Liang Hin, Chun Fai, Jian Yao, Mun Yee....I wish I could name more but it just couldn't come into mind.

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