God Help The Outcasts

I was listening to the songs I used to practice for the school drama, Hunchback of Notre Dame. Really, this disney movie has never really been my favourite but I realize that this song kept coming into my head lately.

Maybe I too am praying the same prayer!

Mess up?

I just reached home after going for a drink with a friend. (No alcohol...only coffee...=P)
Looking at the newspaper on the table, I flip through the pages...and really, it is an evidence of the "mess up" situation around the world. Be it politics, sports, celebrities or other news, it seems that they carry a "situation" with them...
I read some of the news and here are parts of the headlines...

"12th Parliament all set to be a fiery affair"
"Five months' jail for hugging girlfriend is extreme"
"Karpal fires the first salvo"
"Accounts not audited"
"Body of victim found"
"Players blame Chelsea staff for 'Battle at the Bridge' "


And to be a honest, many more.
Looking at my own life, it was not very much different. Remember the conversation I had with Addie the other day and realized that so much problems are left unsolved.

Did I mess up my life?
Yes. To a certain extend I believe.
Question is how to I make it right? Or is it unrightable? The other day I smsed Liang Hin and really, I guess I can honestly said it now that life has been more beautiful and meaningful because of the existence of friendships and family. Although it was the very same reason so many "mess" exists yet nothing matters more than these.

I made myself a hot Milo to drink now while knowing that while "shits" happen, "miracles" also happen. I am thankful to be part of both the mess and the blessing!

Life brief's candle

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death.
Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow,
a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more:
it is a tale
Told by an idiot,
full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing

Yesterday my granduncle past away. I am not one person who is close to my other relatives. But somehow at this point, I felt so much for that man whose life I barely know. Probably it touch my life to know that a man's time to enter into another Kingdom had came. Such a sad occasion yet unavoidable.
Is this all life has to offer?

Looking at the collection

I was rather bored at home.
Nothing much to be done and so I go and take a look at the collection in my room.
My latest collection...the Nike 7.0 Free Transformers. Really cool and cute. Although I will never be able to wear it, I'm sure going to enjoy having this limited edition in my room.

After I transform it into Megatron and Optimus Prime.


When I found this on the net, I was like COOL!!

Anyway besides the transformers that was just bought, I love the sight of Ferraris in my room. One day, I'll make sure that the real "FERRARI" will be in my home.

The best car around the world....FERRARI...isn't that the GARAGE 2008?? Cool...haha!

All of the Ferraris in my room...haha!

Those are the cool collection that has been completed. And well, there are some of the things that I have yet to fully collect it. For example, the Pokemon toys....
This is because Anime characters are always increasing...aiks!

my favourite characters...Pikachu!

I still have a lots...close to 150 but compare to the 400+ available, I think I'm far from completing my collection.
But nevertheless I'm happy with those in my cupboard because they're mainly my favourites.









I guess that is all for this posting...I'm just gonna sit back around with my collections and be satisfied with it.

Happy Birthday, Liang Hin!

I felt as though growing up take away that joy of celebration at times, where life seems so complicated. Really, Liang Hin...I did not spend a lot of time with you during your birthday this time around and honestly I felt terrible because you're the best buddy I ever known.
Anyway Liang Hin, I hope that for all these years that we have come to know one another, this friendship will continue to be a strength and blessing to you in your daily life.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Bro!
This journey has been entirely different because of what you have chose to give to the young people.

Rereading my old BLOG

I was reading my previous blog...the one in BLOGGER as well. Surprisingly I find that I'm quite creative at words also actually. Just read through the KianHin-ish language posting.
I am in the mood to play the same old game.
I was just listening to some old song and that sort of mood just come back. Evon, it's all your fault. Haha! Nah...I like that sort of feeling once a while...
I'm rather bloggish lately....reading blogs and updatingish my bloggy. That day while shopping for Liang Hin's present, we went to some shops that sell bags. Addie mentioned about laptop using the word "Lappy". Rather girlish right? But it made to the list. It actually reminded me of Angie a lil when I started reading back my old blogs and the Ishhi...words but in a way I must be able to bring myself to do things that I used to do with her. All the more now that I have a FANTASTIC girlfriend (Yen Leng), I don't really bothered by the past.
I no longer spend much time with "insensitive jerk" nowadays. (IJ).
People that do too much of "hypocritical blah blah"....
Well, I am rather bored...so get myself into my favourish bloggy....
can't wait for the Red Devils to play tonight though....(football again...I shall rename it as footish.)
Anyway enough of lesson for today.
I like the way the book TUESDAYS WITH MORRIE put it...."we have to recreate a new culture surrounding us."
A new culture that chill all the way....

Nothing much better to do...but I'm bored, also happy!

I don't really like to take photo...but heck! It's gonna take some effort to try everything once a while right? nO harM trying....=P

and not to forget my new PET....Cj7

They're looking sad coz i'm leaving them behind to watch futball!!

Life is about love...about friendship

Most of us don't realize what we need in life until death comes into picture, at least that was what the book "TUESDAY WITH MORRIES" is about...something like that.
I was thinking at what the books teach the readers.
Indeed most of us will not be so ambitious if death is just a step away.
It makes me think of a famous quotation by the Indian great leader, Mahatma Gandhi..."Everytime when I sleep I die and when I'm awake, i'm reborn."
Probably that is the kind of mentality that teach great leaders what are priorities in life.
For us to really live, we need to first die. Probably it is what Jesus was teaching his disciples as well.
There are a lot of things running in my mind at the moment. It makes me wonder if I am at the wrong path at this point of my life. (Money is important but it cannot be our master.) I understand this concept but if death is just a step away, will I be still as ambitious as I am or will I be spending more time on building relationships.
I know I am trying to keep in touch with friends around me but am I really focusing on conversations everyday or are there probably so much running in my head at a time that I lack compassion and love??

The steps that I took everyday....is it really what I love to do?
To live is to die....a paradox indeed but I like the way the author put it in the book....that someday we all are going to die anyway.
Question mark will be when is it going to be?
What will we be doing now?
Wasting our time on a football game or meeting up with an old friends who might need a word of comfort and hug that shows love.

Probably I am trying to live what I believe in but I'm still ambitious....not really a negative sign but something that I need to always check with.
For me, life is about love, about relationships...but then again, if we don't work for money, how are we suppose to support the people that we love...probably it is a healthy balance we need to achieve...too much of "probably"....too much of "uncertainty".
Detachment at times in life is needed so that life in its' fullest can take place.
Probably that is what the Buddhist beliefs that attract me.
Cheers for 'DETACHMENT'!!

source of image: www.cartoonstock.com

Detachment could mean more than asking people to stay out of your life. It is about learning to let go off certain emotions as well as dreams.
It is about seeing life more than just achievements.
When death has truly taken place, then man will be able to truly live a life again. For me to live is to die and to die is to truly live. Once again I say, "To live is to die and to die is to truly live."
Cheers for DEATH!! Cheers for LIFE!! Cheers for FRIENDSHIP AND LOVE!!!
A new journey begins!

It's all started from somewhere...

I just read the blog written by a very good friend, Liang Hin. It was indeed true that relationship is full of complexity and to talk about loving selflessly is more like lying with the knowledge at the back of your mind. I was relooking at the photos I took with my friends and really, now that I look at it, it all seem so long ago....and though some were taken a few months ago....where my STPM exam was about to over.
Friendship seem so "impossible" as life moves on...with each and everyone of us having more important stuff to do and it is really not "wrong" to ignore friends at times.
It is just so impossible to be keeping in touch with everyone as our own circle of friends expand. But yet it is not about getting the news all the time or updating one another all the time....it is about the coming together once in a while and being there for one another in times of needs.
Evon's blog was awesome...about moving on and stuff...touchy (but I did not cry because of that) and really make us rethink of the word "brothers, friends.." etc.
A matter of choice maybe....just as I chose to be spending my time late at night blogging...instead of having a good rest.
Some friends move on and sometimes misunderstanding took place and a friendship is broken....but the past is history and moving on is the "BIG STEP" we need to take.(while some friends mean a lot to me, circumstances make it impossible for us to remain as buddies...)
Not forgetting about the many beautiful experience but knowing the limitation of mankind.
Relationship is not about love out of convenience neither is it just about the "feeling at the moment"...more so the time and effort both parties spend to understand one another better, not to change one another. (I totally understand what you mean, LiangHin.)
Yet it is not all as easy as the words being typed inside here...

My ALMA MATER

Looking into St. Michael brought me many memories...some that are rather embarrassing and also sad but many of the good things that I learned through the years.
The buildings are awesome and is beautiful but it was not always so "captivating" to the eyes. It was once a small hut type of school...KAMPUNG PISANG style and it was through the efforts of people, not Heroes but ordinary people (it is suffocating to have the thought of being special and making difference. we need to start having new perspectives at the word making a difference, leaving a legacy etc.) of different races and beliefs (a community). I guess relationships or the better word, friendship works in such a way.
It was not always beautiful...it will be ugly even at times now...but it is the every little effort of a community, learning to love a little more everyday.

There is a need for the community to exist, be it in a formal way or a casual way...(is there such a thing as a casual community hangout together?) I was one of the most active youth in my church and when "shits" hit my life in church (betrayal, hurts, lies...) everything change. I need a new group of people to be my support in a way...(people who are not wearing masks...people who are human enough to make mistakes)

I chose to live with the "humans" and not the "saints".
And this is my new life....a life human enough for me to know that these people are living.
I remembered I heard this once from someplace (forgot where but might be in church also...loL! or from a movie...) "There are people that will seem to be very busy in life...working 24/7, some preaching 24/7. =P But the fact is that these people are not living...their lives are merely an act of desperate attempt for power while some to influence others. These people are comparatively equal with "ZOMBIES"...."
Something like that...not exactly the actual words...add it the way I feel it's nice. (so I was once a Zombie too?? maybe actually...)

And these human lives are no easy experience...because I'm not a saint that will either be praying all the time and talking about GOD as if He is that "PRODUCT IN A JUMBO SALE" nor will I wanna be people who KEEPS SO MUCH GOLD FOR THEMSELVES that eventually they forgot the money is only for temporary usage. (I'm being very sarcastic here but I need to really remind myself that I'm only in a process of learning....if someone give me 1BILLION USD, I might fail to live up to my beliefs)

It was one of the best 2 years I have (not to forget the many good times I have with Liang Hin & Co. hehe...just kidding ya bout the Co. thing.) I do not have to be leading people all the time...there was no real leader...it was about growing together, playing together and "taking photos before we're too old to look cool anymore." that was how life has been.

some group of different people that change my life.

Not every class could dream of winning the marching competition in SMI...and you have only one last chance before leaving the AWESOME BUILDING and we did it...through hardwork and discipline as well as unity, we WON IT....champion in 2007...beyond that, we're championing the spirit of unity in diversity..."look at that cowboy there...he might not be as cool as me but he can really shout and command."(just kidding)

What about struggles?? I couldn't forget the look at the faces of Kok San, Sin Hau, Moses and some others when the exam date was drawing closer....they were full of "NEVER SAY DIE ATTITUDE" and at the same time remain as "funny as they always will be."
And the hard time teaching Yen Leng Maths...loL! (just kiddin! I enjoyed it as much as I felt I should be doing more important stuff...so NO REGRETS)

PARTY TIME!!

Every community need to have some time to celebrate together...and THE SIXTH FORM NITE gave us that atmosphere...not to forget the rather "impromptu performance" I had with Wai Hin. Of course we have many other PARTY TIME as well but this was one of those where everyone present. Now that it's over, I'm missing it more.

EXAM WAS AROUND THE CORNER BUT WE WERE CHILLING IT TOGETHER!!!

One shot is just not enough...

Best class of 2007...USS1

And so it was....now that GOODBYES are coming, we are going to move on...carrying ourselves with beliefs that goodness and friendship is possible.
Just the other day Boon Tat had his bday party in KBOX....and really boss!! YOU ROXX! =P
It was really different having someone like you as monitor...simply "FANTASTIC". So here is some of the available pics that I stolen from someone's friendster profile. =P

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOSS!!!

the man of the hour

It was really a nice lil snapshots of friends and an experience which give me enough courage to continue to struggle on in the "ugliness" of the society.
It is really important to acknowledge the importance of those around you and really, we only have one chance to live....and that's all about our lives.
I still have so much to learn and I know at the point where everything seems to be void and muddled, I have the support of those who I call "friends" and not to forget about the closest people to me...my family.

Breaking the "system" in a gracious manner...Friends for life...(me, Addie and Samuel)

It's not everyday I found a true friend...isn't it? (the tall friend of mine, Jian Yao...)

I could not understand the term "love" better than going through it myself...(not that we are selflessly loving one another, but while at times we were selfishly loving ourselves, we learn the meaning of giving a little with what we can everyday...)
And no better person to teach me that than Liang Hin....Oh man! You're really the man...haha!
Hope that the more we differ in our views, the more will we cherish the diversity of mankind. So I'm looking forward to having more different ideas and perspectives from yours...wakakaka!!....(keep your blog alive ya...and giving space...really, that is a cool pic.)

My "GURU"...haha! A brother that will stand for me...(No wonder I have so much to laugh about despite of the "NOTHINGNESS" in life.)

It was really suffocating to be on a new road...a new phase of life where "beautiful memories" such as all these will have to remain in the past while moving on...but I know at the end of the day, I have everything to be happy about because I knew that no matter how far and busy each of us is going to be, the friendship that we have last til the end of the journey in life.

Not to forget the "BUDDIES" at home...

Sometimes looking back, I wonder what I've done that worth mentioning of...because it all seems so "meaningless" and HOPELESS at the end of it all. But "love" is what inspires me to say...it's worth struggling for.
Creating a better world...I don't know how to do it without a community.
Cheers for the COMMUNITY!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOON TAT!!

It was an awesome night and though I'm not a big fan of KBOX but I love the company of the people. It could have been some time since I meet up with friends and do things together but it was really a night to remember. Thx BOON TAT for including me in the party of yours. Haha! Hope that you had a memorable birthday before moving on in life.
I just read this book....TUESDAYS with MORRIE and honestly, I'm a bit influenced by the author of the book, in a positive way I supposed.
It made me think more of the people around me and yah...life is not just about successful story I supposed. It means connecting with people and how to enrich the values of humanity. Not just about having power, money, influence or anything.

But this post is for you, Boon Tat...so not gonna write anything much here but that I'm great to have you as a friend, more than just a friend but a brother.
God bless!!!